Chapter Thirty-Four

I had been so exhausted when the knock on the door came. I had told Jack the run down of what happened because I wanted us to still be friends, I want to be able to trust him. I also told him it was true Ren asked to join the clans. Though I left out the out bust proposal where I gave Ren a tongue lashing. I could tell he was unhappy about it but in the end, he told me I should except and then give up this crazy hunt. Problem is I won't stop I now want the answers for myself not just for Ren but for me and for Daniel. So many life's where ruined and broken. Yes, I know people are after me now, Yes, I know people are rising against the Feng clan because of me being with but I am in to deep. So, when I saw Ren standing there full of regret, I told myself I should just send him back to his room because last time I caved to him the next morning I was given a rude awakening. However, something is me is telling me to trust. Though I think it has more to do with our match makers constantly stepping in to relay information. If Mike hadn't told me in the elevator what he had done and about Ren I don't know what I would have said I don't even think I could consider it, because I didn't even want to consider sharing him if it was going to keep going like this. Hearing he might be feeling the same as me though part of me is screaming out that maybe we just keep misunderstanding each other and all we need is reassurance. Problem is Ren gets bored easily and fast. If it's possible he can just see me not my family I'd be happy but, I'm still scared that someday I will become boring to him or he can't over look it one day he goes up and down so quickly I'm scared. I can't stop these thoughts laying in the bed facing away from Ren who takes up the other side of my bed unconscious. It's as if my brain doesn't remember the steamy, passionate moment we had in the shower then continued in the room shortly after leaving the shower desperate to make up for lost time.

"What's wrong Angel face?" Ren's soft voice against my ear makes me tense his arms wrap around me pulling me close against him. His warmth transfers to me.

I shake my head. "Nothing." I whisper.

"Then why are you crying?" His was calm and low.

"I'm not." I say I feel his hand slide up from around my waist and her caresses my cheek to my surprise I feel the slipperiness between his finger and my skin. I had been crying and hadn't noticed but he had. I roll over a little so I can look up into his face.

"You are my love,"

"I'm sorry." I say, He doesn't get mad that I don't explain he pulls me closer on top of him and pets me till I all that's left is darkness and the warm feeling of his touch and I fall asleep.

****

I don't understand why she started to cry. Was she filled with regret sleeping with me again? All I knew was she was hurting I just wanted to make her stop hurting. I pulled her close trying to show her I'm there I will be there for her. I didn't just want her body that wasn't what this was. I need her to understand that. As she drifted off, I continued to hold her tight through out the night.

****

Waking my head hurt like hell I winced in pain.

"You okay?" Ren's soft sexy morning voice froze me. I blinked open my eyes I was snuggled up against him head resting on his chest. Right I fell asleep to him petting me to calm my raging thoughts of anxiety.

"Yeah, sorry just bit of a headache." I say pushing up off him.

"Don't get up yet." I hear his request and can't help tilting my head in curiosity.

"Why?"

"Because firstly once we are up then it's back to business personally, I want little more this time seeing as last time it got ruined," he looks at me as if he's waiting to hear me argue. I just listen. "Secondly I'm not surprised you have a headache I'm surprised it took so long the bruise it pretty bad and then when you cried last night probably made it worse you should give your head time to rest. Do you still pack pain killers I'll get you some and a glass of water so you can rest?" He stands and goes over to my still unpacked back though it's been torn through and without asking begins opening the side pockets. I watch in silence as he retrieves the bottle and walks to the rest room where I keep a glass and fills it with tap water and bring them to me the pills already dosed out in his hand.

I purse my lips together "Thanks though you know I am capable of doing it myself."

"Fully aware of it honey, though can't help it you look like a small child makes me want to take care of you right now."

I almost spit out the pills and water. "What did you just call me." I pick up a pillow and toss it at him. He laughs and sits on the bed. If I'm a child you're a pedophile smart ass.

"Your childish look comes and goes." He smiles mockingly.

"I'll kill you!"

He laughs at my threat "Long as you don't slice open my sausage the way you did David's think I'm survive." The look on amusement and pain at the idea on his face I start laughing and oh fuck that makes my head hurt more.

I wince "Ouch." I grab at it. He laughs harder.

"Poor baby." I smack him your fault.

A knock comes at the door which doesn't help my head and interrupts our playful banter. I stand to answer expecting Jack so early. Ren however; gently pushes me back down on the bed and goes to unlock it.

"If you want a report soon as possible My Lord least you can do is answer your phone." Maliki walks in followed by Mike. I had never been so glad then I was right then that last night I had argued that it would be better if I put pajamas on after our fun though Ren had argued against it. I got so use to Jack just walking in I started making sure to always be dressed as to never lead him on. The man I swear had no manors or common sense with that stuff. Though Ren tended to just let these two walk in as the pleased in the past as well though I generally always had a rob and a screen to hide so that I could get dressed if they came in. When I lived in servants' quarters they always knocked first.

Mike strolls over to me as Ren and Maliki talk "hey little sis want some ice for the bruise to help it go down?"

"Is it really that bad?" I can tell the look on his face he's worried though I don't think it's about the bruise.

"What happens wrong Mike?" He smiles little for me.

"Nothing. Just thought you might hate me or least be pissed at me for what I told you." He scratches his head. He looks every inch the young youth I thought he looked when I first met him right now.

I lean in to whisper "You told me the truth, I can't say it was a smart decision exactly, but I understand why you did it. Like you told me once, no matter what we are family you just wanted to help. In the end in a weird way you did." I smile up at him then I look at Ren. He looks troubled and I want to know why.

I stand and walk over the them Mike following "What's going on?"

"Your returning to Silverman Manor today."

"What?"