Chapter 18 - Inside My Heart

Sheng Li and Lei Wanxi could be seen in the residence of the Crown Prince. They both were seated around a round table on the respective stools. Sheng Li poured the wine into the porcelain cup and gulped it in a shot. "Be slow, your highness," stated Lei Wanxi as he grabbed the porcelain cup.

Sheng Li glared at him and spoke, "Why did you come in between us in the morning? I was so infuriated because of her naïve behavior. I do not understand what did father see in her that he made us two marry."

Lei Wanxi put the cup down on the table. "Brother Sheng, father has taken a good decision, according to me. Miss Xue is not the right woman with whom you should get involved. You also know the intentions of the prime minister. He tried shaking our father's position in the early days when he took over the throne.

If brother Sheng were married to Miss Xue then, I am afraid that throne would have received its strongest enemy through you," Lei Wanxi proclaimed.

"Do you really think that the prime minister would be able to take advantage of me?" Sheng Li questioned Lei Wanxi who snickered.

"Brother Sheng, he has ministerial support for a very long time. That is why Father is not able to remove him till now," asserted Lei Wanxi.

"Wanxi, are you telling me not to marry Xue Yu Yan? At least you shall understand me. I am in love with Xue. I see her as my woman. I want her to be my crown princess," Sheng Li proclaimed.

Lei Wanxi slightly laughed. "It seems brother Sheng does not know the meaning of Love," Lei Wanxi stated and sipped the drink from the porcelain cup.

"What do you mean? Are you saying this cruel man does not know about love?" Sheng Li queried Lei Wanxi and poured the drink for himself.

"Cruel man?" muttered Lei Wanxi. "I do not dare to think like that. I am just saying that brother Sheng does not know what is love!" Lei Wanxi asserted.

Sheng Li was annoyed hearing that. "Do not talk like Ying Lili. She also told me that a cruel man like me deserves no love," Sheng Li with an exasperation stated and tightly grabbed the cup.

"Sister Lili might have said in anger. She is such a gentle-kind woman and the way she talks makes anyone melt. I think brother Sheng might have infuriated her or scared her that's why she said this to you," Lei Wanxi opined. He was smiling and waiting for the answer from Sheng Li.

"She is the only woman who does not afraid of me. For the first time in my life, I am tied because of my father. I let Ying Lili speak and yet I am not able to kill her. Why? Because father will get hurt. I do not know why her voice seemed so sweet to you all but to me it is kind of provocative as if she is ready to fight with me at any instant.

She accused me when I did not kill her father and let her foolish uncle rule Juyan who killed her father. I wonder why father thinks that she is the smartest woman out there when to me she is the dumbest," Sheng Li blurted out everything and then drank the wine.

Lei Wanxi started laughing which confused Sheng Li. "Are my talks funny to you?" Sheng Li questioned Lei Wanxi who stopped laughing.

"Indeed, they are funny. Han Sheng Li is irritated by a woman. Isn't it funny? It seems you two are in a war of Love. Brother Sheng, this is love. You are not in love with Xue because if you would be then you would not have married Sister Lili even if the father gave you the order or you would have killed Sister Lili to make things easier for you," stated Lei Wanxi.

Sheng Li shook his head in refusal. "You do not understand," Sheng Li mumbled which Lei Wanxi heard.

"I do understand you, brother Sheng. But you are not understanding. You should not have let come Miss Xue to your residence. Sister Lili must be agitated seeing you two while you two were making out," Lei Wanxi pronounced with a serious tone.

"I was not making out with her. She kissed me and by then Ying Lili came inside. Furthermore, it shall not matter to Ying Lili. I already told her that I have a lover," stated Sheng Li.

"Brother Sheng, Miss Xue is intervening in your married life and your status as a just crown prince as well. Let's take a situation. What if sister Lili is kissed by a man other than you?- will you let go of that because you do not love her or would you feel agitated?" Lei Wanxi asked.

Sheng Li chuckled and spoke, "Why would I be agitated? She can do anything she wants because I have nothing to do with her," asserted Sheng Li.

"Brother Sheng, do not give a vague answer. Okay, what if sister Lili is kissed by the first brother? Will, you not react at all? He calls sister Lili as 'Ying'er' so, you can see the first brother wants to claim your wife," Lei Wanxi proclaimed.

"But he cannot because she is married to me. Now, let's stop. You shall leave, prince Wanxi. It was nice talking to you. Have a good night's sleep," Sheng Li wished him who gave a nod and left from there.

~~~~~

An-Ying Lili was roaming in the Imperial Garden. Court Lady Xu and the other attendants were standing a few meters away in a row with bowed heads. The breeze was gentle which to some extent calmed down Ying Lili's nerves.

She missed her home where she used to have a night walk with her father after dinner every day. Her father used to tell her about the subject matters on which he used to give the judgments. The crown princess was missing her father's presence. "For you, I am here, father," An-Ying Lili murmured.

"I do not know how is my mother doing? Is she taking good care of herself?" Ying Lili further thought. "I used to consider myself strong but, when the time came I was helpless and could not stop anything. Married with the crown prince who does not even understand human emotions! I wish I could change this," Ying Lili muttered as she looked at the pond which was lit by the moonlight.

"Indeed, the crown princess can change him if she wants," Ying Lili heard the Emperor's voice. She immediately turned and saw the Emperor just came there.

"Your Imperial Majesty," Ying Lili proclaimed as she bowed her head, gracefully. Han Wenji came near Ying Lili stood beside her. Ying Lili turned back and said, "I shall take my leave, your majesty."

"Crown princess, let's have a conversation," the emperor told Ying Lili who gave a nod.

"I used to come here with someone but she is no more here. Her memories left behind only," Han Wenji stated. Ying Lili realized that the emperor was longing for one of his concubines. The emperor seemed sad and it could be seen on the emperor's face that this place was precious to him.

"The Palace is empty without her but, then she left her most precious thing behind her. Her son, Han Sheng Li," Han Wenji proclaimed and smiled. Ying Lili widened her eyes because she thought the crown prince was the son of the Empress. Then, she recalled Lady Xu was telling her about the crown prince but she did not pay heed that time.

"W-what? The crown prince is not the son of the Empress?" Ying Lili asked with a startled expression.

Han Wenji turned his eyes towards Ying Lili when she lowered them. "My official wife died when Sheng Li was four years old. Indeed, the Empress is his mother but not the birth mother.

Since you not know then it is obvious you two are not close even after getting married. Crown princess, Sheng Li is only cruel from the outside but his heart is like a child. Maybe, he turned cruel because his father never looked after him because of the duties as a King at that time.

He was a kind child who could not even kill an ant but when I met him after five years, he had become a different person. That's why I made you two marry because I believe a cold heart can be melted by a warm heart. My son needs the love which I believe only you can give him."

Han Wenji's eyes were teary as if he regretted not being with his son. They say an Emperor is a tough person but he turns soft seeing his children and subjects. "But, the crown prince does not like my presence neither I do. Does his majesty really think I can be the one who can give him love? Moreover, he…his highness killed my father and that grudge is still inside my heart," Ying Lili proclaimed.