Chapter 211 Lin Zhou: The Ce Fei's Story 2
Even though Tao Gu Gu knew that something was wrong, she didn't dare to ask anyone else for help. She could only find her sister-in-law and let her ask about it to physicians in the village. It was better than nothing... They had no friends in the prince's palace, so she couldn't even entrust the Ce Fei to the other servants.
She knew very well that they were sent by the prince as a spy. She was supposed to be one. If the Ce Fei wasn't Tao Gu Gu's benefactor, she certainly wouldn't help her too.
The physicians that her sister-in-law found said that there was also an occurrence like depression when a woman was pregnant or just gave birth to a baby. There were a lot of possibilities for that to happen. This type of depression was actually rare to happen at the noble ladies because their environment was quite stable and also usually because the noblemen loved to have a lot of kids --- they usually pampered the pregnant woman to the max.
However, to the lower class people, it was a common occurrence. They lived in a poor environment and not all of them had a doting husband. It was hard for them to find food and still eager for their husbands' love, this could lead to depression.
Tao Gu Gu knew that what happened to the Ce Fei was because the side effects of the 'Intense Pleasure' and it was also combined with her previous depression. Tao Gu Gu could only sigh. The physician didn't really have a method to treat the Ce Fei and Tao Gu Gu could only promise her freedom after giving birth. She didn't even know what would happen to the child but in her mind, the Ce Fei was the most important thing for her.
Looking at the Ce Fei's condition, it would already a miracle if she could survive by herself. Could she entrust the baby to her? Tao Gu Gu didn't think so. She had a premonition that if she stayed inside the palace, she would die in depression. Why didn't she try to give her a chance of freedom?
Tao Gu Gu knew that she couldn't leave the palace along with the Ce Fei because it would only hinder the Ce Fei's movement, so she decided to stay in the prince palace --- just for keeping the baby safe. She could just ask for her sister-in-law's place to find a good place for the Ce Fei. She felt lucky that she had redeemed their slaves' contract before, otherwise, no one would be able to help her.
Tao Gu Gu had asked for the Ce Fei's permission and they sold the Ce Fei's jewelry one by one so they could keep the money for the Ce Fei to spend in the outside. They didn't dare to prepare a place in advance because they were afraid that it would lead back to Tao Gu Gu's family. once the Ce Fei gained her freedom, it would be up to her to survive.
Tao Gu Gu smiled bitterly to herself when she saw the cheerful Ce Fei. She had asked whether she wanted to take the baby, but she just smiled at her and didn't give her a definite answer. That was why Tao Gu Gu knew that she could only rely on herself to make the baby safe. However, she would need help from other people.
Yao Ling asked in confusion, "The Ce Fei lived in a foreign kingdom, was there really someone that was willing to help both of you?"
"It wasn't that they were willing... it was because of a stroke of luck..." Tao Gu Gu said.
"Huh?" Yao Ling asked in confusion.
"You don't need to worry! You will know everything once I finish telling you the story."
Yao Ling nodded and she could only patiently listen to the rest of the story. It seemed like this story wasn't going to be simple at all. "Did... she give birth safely?" Yao Ling really wanted to know this point --- it was whether the Ce Fei was actually still alive or not.
Tao Gu Gu nodded. "Yes, she finally gave birth safely despite her depression."
"Did... she leave right away?" Yao Ling asked.
"No... I manage to persuade her to leave after one month. I wanted her to recuperate first, otherwise, she wouldn't survive on the outside world." Tao Gu Gu answered.
Yao Linghesitantly asked, "What... what was her reaction toward the baby?" She wanted to know whether she loved Han Xiang or not.
Tao Gu Gu sighed and she decided to drink her tea once more, just to calm her own self down. Thinking back around that time, it was a painful memory. Tao Gu Gu shook her head, "She... wasn't in a really good state of mind, so... she didn't even take a glance at the baby. Although once in a while, I found that she cried sadly beside the baby crib."
Tao Gu Gu didn't tell her the heartbreaking things that the Ce Fei had said around that time, "I'm sorry... I'm sorry... little one... if only... if only... you are Lin Zheng's and mine's child... I will love you with all my heart. However, each time I saw you... I can only see those dreadful nights and how I betrayed Lin Zheng..."
Tao Gu Gu knew that she wanted to love the baby, but she was incapable to. There were too many damages in the woman's body and soul. She was beyond broken...
Yao Ling didn't know how to respond. After all, she never had a kid before and she had never gone through what the Ce Fei had gone through. She pitied Han Xiang but she couldn't put the blame on the Ce Fei too. This was all because of the current Han Emperor and that lowly woman's cruelty. If Lin Jian knew about this... would he seek revenge? Not only him... General Lin would probably also couldn't help himself back.
This was the woman that they loved and adored dearly they were talking about...
The current Han Emperor looked so infatuated back then and Yao Ling believed that everyone thought that she would be treated like a gem... But, it didn't seem so. She was only treated like a breeding machine and sex slave.
Tao Gu Gu defended the Ce Fei's decision, after all, she was the one who was there and she had seen all of her pain. "The Ce Fei... I couldn't say that she wasn't wrong, but it was the best decision at that time. If you saw her depression, you would know. It was so severe back then."
Yao Ling murmured her agreement. However, deep down inside her heart, she had always questioning herself... Why did she was abandoned by her birth parents? Why didn't they want her? Was she so unlovable that it made them make the decision to abandon her? When she listened to Ce Fei's painful experience, she started to change the way she thought about her birth parents.
She had a little bit of hope...
Maybe... just maybe... they had their own difficulties... It made her more determined to find her real family! She would talk about this to Yao Ying after she finished listening to Tao Gu Gu's story.
"Tao Gu Gu... do you know what happened after the Ce Fei was gone? What happened to the Ce Fei? I've heard that it was a famous story how the Shu woman ran away from the prince..." Yao Ling asked. "Did she actually really... successfully run away?"