Chapter 18.3 - ALIC Chapter 18.3

Seeing his indifferent appearance, the woman struggled to crawl towards him, blood leaving a hideous trace on the ground. She reached a trembling hand out: “The phone is on the table, you…you help me to make a call …Call an ambulance, okay…”

Lu Zhen remained unmoved.

The blood flow made her feel that death was approaching and her expression became hideous because of fear: “Hurry up and call, let people come and save me! You can’t watch a person die! I, I can go to jail, Yes… I will go to jail… Quick save me!”

“You, bastard, I should have killed you long ago!”

“I, I want to kill you…”

“Sob, you, you can’t not save me…”

“Xiaozhen, I was wrong, you save me… Think about Lu Sui, he, he always treated you as his own brother…”

“You and Lu Sui have such a good relationship. If he knows that you didn’t save me, he will…will not forgive, you…”

The woman cried for a while, laughed for a while. She was sometimes crazy, sometimes frightened, sometimes desperate.

Lu Zhen just watched. He watched the blood under her body pool, gradually staining the ground red… When the red color was about to approach him, he took a step back gently to prevent the blood from dirtying his feet.

For the first time, his heart was filled with such filthy and ugly hatred and disgust, and for the first time he wanted to see a person die. He even enjoyed the sight of her desperate pleading and dying struggle in front of him.

Until the woman was completely silent, Lu Zhen walked over calmly. He tested the woman’s breath with her fingers and made sure that she could not be saved anymore before dialing the call for help.

Lu Zhen was rescued.

He was sent back to the Lu’s house by the police, and the woman’s body was sent for an autopsy. The cause of death was excessive blood loss. The kidnapper was quickly caught. In order to reduce his sentence, he took the initiative to confess his criminal behavior and admitted that the woman died of homicide. He ran away because of fear and did not check whether the woman died on the spot. In the end, the police told the man that the woman was not dead at the time and that she could be saved if she called the police in time, but everything had already occurred, and the man was still in jail for kidnapping and manslaughter.

The dust settled on this matter.

Only Lu Zhen knew, he actually had a chance to save her.

Does that count as him killing her?

In the end, his father came to visit him and told him that he hoped that he could keep the secret and not tell Lu Sui the truth. His father was worried that Lu Sui could not bear such a double blow, could not accept such a cruel reality, and did not want Lu Sui to live this life in pain and self-blame… Lu Zhen agreed. He always thought that his father didn’t care about Lu Sui, but he didn’t know until this moment how much his father actually loved Lu Sui. Even after his mother made such a mistake, he still wanted to protect the child.

[t/n: double blow as in his mother died and she was the instigator… not that Lu Zhen didn’t save her.]

After Lu Zhen returned home, he kept avoiding Lu Sui because he suddenly found that he could not face Lu Sui.

Whenever he closed his eyes in the dead of night, the woman would stand in front of him covered in blood and ask him bitterly: Why didn’t you save me? You killed me! Lu Sui will not forgive you, he will definitely avenge me!

He woke up again and again, nightmares haunting him.

This was the only thing he did against his conscience, but did he regret it? What if he could do it all over again? Will he choose to return good for evil to save her?

No, he didn’t regret it.

He didn’t want to save her at all. There are times when he would hate, and there would also be willful moments.

He just doesn’t know how to face Lu Sui. Lu Sui was innocent, he doesn’t know anything, yet he trusts himself like this…

But avoidance is not a way. One day, he was blocked by Lu Sui.

The boy looked at him with sad and aggrieved eyes, and shouted: “Why do you keep refusing to look at me? Is it because you dare not look at me?”

Lu Zhen looked at him without speaking.

Seeing that he became even more angry like this, Lu Su suddenly rushed over and gave him a big push, his eyes widened and said, “It’s all your fault, it’s all your fault!”

Lu Zhen staggered, but did not deny it.

Lu Sui cried, “Why don’t you speak, why don’t you deny it? I hate you, I hate you…”

Lu Zhen was speechless.

Lu Sui was still just a child. He must be very helpless now. He needed to be cared for and comforted, but he can’t accompany him like before...Because part of your current pain is caused by me.

In that cold and damp room, the indelible and terrifying memory followed him like a shadow.

Sorry, I made you suffer so much.

The woman seemed to be standing beside him, giving a cold and sarcastic laugh: Look, Lu Sui will not forgive you, you killed me, I blame you, it would be great if you didn’t exist!

Lu Zhen turned around and left.

Seeing him leave, Lu Sui chased after him, crying. “Why do you want to go, why? Even you don’t want me…”

You are right, I don’t want you anymore.

The next day, his father learned about it from the maids. He went to tell Lu Sui not to be willful, but Lu Sui vented his pain regardless. He lost his mother and his brother didn’t want him anymore. He started to cause a fuss. He who doesn’t know how to express himself could only blame his brother blindly. This made his father very angry and disappointed, so he decided to send Lu Sui to a boarding school.

He provided Lu Sui a comfortable life, but gave Lu Zhen his care and company.

Lu Zhen knew this was his father’s way of compensation.

Time passed and a few years later, Lu Zhen no longer thought of this incident. The woman no longer appeared in his dreams. By accident, he met Lu Sui again.

The former teenager has grown up, but even if they met, he just look at him coldly.

Time and hurt caused an irreparable rift between them, but Lu Zhen suddenly remembered his promise. He once said that he would protect him forever. I’m sorry…I didn’t leave you on purpose.

In fact, I always care about you.

I hope you can come back.

………………

Lin Ziran opened his mouth abruptly and panted, his chest heaving. Lu Zhen’s memory passed through his mind like a revolving lantern, very fast, but also very real, as if he could feel genuine fear, loss, self-blame, pain…

Everything made sense.

Lin Ziran slowly turned his head, looking at Lu Sui with a complicated expression.

Lu Sui didn’t expect that Lin Ziran would faint suddenly. He anxiously brought him to the sofa, knelt in front of Lin Ziran on one knee. He looked at him with trepidation, clutching his hands tightly, and his voice was stifled: “Brother, what’s the matter with you? Are you okay? I’m scared…”

I’m afraid you will leave me again and leave me all alone…

Lin Ziran sighed, this poor child didn’t know anything.

He slowly and firmly took his hand out of Lu Sui’s, and turned slightly, looking at him with a calm expression. “Don’t you always want me to admit the truth? You know. Was it the truth at the time? Okay, then I will tell you the whole truth…”

Lu Sui looked at Lin Ziran’s eyes and suddenly felt anxious, “Brother…”

Lin Ziran looked at him directly and slowly said: “It was indeed her who kidnapped me back then, and was accidentally injured by the kidnapper…but she was not dead when the kidnapper left.”

Lu Sui was a little at a loss. He didn’t know why Lin Ziran said this. He said, “I know, she lost too much blood to die…”

“No, you don’t know.” Lin Ziran’s voice was cold, looking at Lu Sui as he said word by word: “I was by her side at the time, and she begged me to save her…but I didn’t save her, I just kept watching. I watched her die in front of me.

Because I don’t want to save her. I hate her, do you understand?

Later, every day and night, I saw her standing in front of me covered in blood, asking why I didn’t save her.

And every time I see you, I think of her, I see her by my side, accusing me. It made me think of the fear and pain she brought me, think of my own deception, so I left you alone and avoided you… because at that time, I had no way to face you. ”

Lin Ziran saw Lu Sui’s pale and shocked face and let out a soft breath, but his voice was extremely indifferent: “This is the truth you wanted to know.

Even so, do you still want my forgiveness?”